Understanding Trauma Responses: Fight, Flight, Freeze, Attach, Submit
Fight, Flight, Freeze, Attach, Submit created by Chris Cushing
Have you found yourself reacting to a stressful situation with a surge of energy to confront it head-on? Or you’ve wanted to escape, retreat, or simply shut down entirely? These kinds of reactions are trauma responses—deeply ingrained survival mechanisms our brain and body activate to protect us during moments of perceived danger. Trauma responses are natural, and they’re rooted in our biology, but they can sometimes linger long after the threat has passed, influencing how we interact with others and with ourselves.
What Are Trauma Responses and Why Do They Happen?
Trauma responses are instinctive, split-second decisions our nervous system makes when we perceive a threat to our safety or wellbeing. These responses are tied to our primal need for survival, drawing on the same mechanisms that once helped our ancestors evade predators or other dangers in the wild. They are controlled by the brain’s limbic system—specifically the amygdala, which acts as our internal alarm system. (By the way: because the limbic system is evolutionarily one of the oldest parts of the brain and one we share with ancient animals, it’s also known as the lizard brain.)
The purpose of a trauma response is simple: maximize the chance of survival. Whether it’s through confrontation, escape, freezing to assess danger, bonding with others, or surrendering to minimize harm, these reactions are meant to protect us. However, in the context of past trauma or ongoing stress, these reactions can become overactive, showing up in situations where there isn’t an immediate threat.
Let’s look at the five primary trauma responses—fight, flight, freeze, attach, and submit—and explore their characteristics and behaviors.
1. Fight
The fight response is the body gearing up to confront a threat directly. You might feel a sharp rise in energy, anger, or even aggression as your body prepares to defend itself.
Characteristics:
Increased heart rate, clenched fists, clenched jaw, or tense posture.
Outbursts of anger or irritability.
A rush of adrenaline that makes someone feel more confrontational or defensive.
Examples:
Raising your voice during a disagreement.
Physically stepping forward to confront a perceived danger.
While the fight response can be helpful in situations where setting boundaries or protecting oneself is essential, it can also show up in everyday life where confrontation may not be the solution, like snapping at a loved one.
2. Flight
Flight is the urge to avoid or escape, either physically or emotionally, from a dangerous or uncomfortable situation. When you feel like withdrawing, removing yourself, or just not dealing with the situation, that’s your flight response talking.
Characteristics:
Restlessness, anxiety, or fidgeting.
An intense need to leave discussions or environments that feel uncomfortable.
Overworking or hyper-focusing on tasks to avoid difficult emotions.
Examples:
Leaving a room during an argument to relieve the tension.
Avoiding certain people, places, or situations that remind you of past trauma.
Distracting yourself with other stimuli.
Not every challenge or conflict is worth challenging head on. Avoidance could be a valid response if the issue isn’t worth it to you or the relationship isn’t important to maintain.
3. Freeze
The freeze response is what happens when the body “locks up” in the face of danger. Instead of fighting or fleeing, someone freezes and becomes immobile, hoping to go unnoticed or waiting to evaluate their options.
Characteristics:
Feeling paralyzed and unable to act or speak.
Emotional numbness or detachment.
Brain fog or dissociation, where reality feels dreamlike or distant.
Examples:
Being “frozen” in the middle of a presentation or public speaking moment.
Feeling mentally or physically stuck during a stressful conversation.
While freezing can give the body time to process threats, it can leave someone feeling powerless or unable to take charge of situations in the aftermath.
4. Attach
The attach response—sometimes referred to as “tend and befriend”—involves forming connections or seeking support to feel safe during or after trauma. People may instinctively bond with others, even clinging to relationships that are unhealthy, in order to create a sense of stability.
Characteristics:
Over-reliance or co-dependence on others for reassurance or emotional support.
Difficulty setting personal boundaries.
Behaviors aimed at pleasing others, even at personal expense.
Examples:
Staying in a toxic relationship because it feels safer than being alone.
Reaching out to friends, family, or coworkers immediately during a stressful moment for comfort or validation.
This response is based on the need for human connection, but it can also lead us to prioritize others’ needs above our own, neglecting personal healing and growth in the process.
5. Submit
Submit is surrendering to a situation in hopes of minimizing harm. Instead of resisting or escaping, submission is about compliance—opting to “play it safe,” accommodating in the face of perceived authority or power.
Characteristics:
Agreeing with others to avoid conflict or confrontation.
Feeling defeated, powerless, or resigned in the face of stress.
Difficulty asserting yourself or asking for what you need.
Examples:
Agreeing to extra work or responsibility at your job to avoid upsetting your boss.
Going along with someone else’s decisions, even if they don’t align with your values or desires.
Although submission can be a survival strategy, especially in situations where resistance would lead to harm, it can foster habits of self-sacrifice that are hard to break over time.
Moving toward understanding and healing
Recognizing and understanding trauma responses is a first step toward personal growth and healing. When these responses persist long after actual danger is gone, they can shape behaviors, emotions, and relationships in ways that feel limiting or harmful. But here’s the good news—our brains are adaptable, and through awareness and support, we can learn to release these patterns.
Therapy can be a powerful way to work through trauma responses. A mental health professional can help identify these patterns, address underlying causes, and explore healthier coping mechanisms. Practices like mindfulness and somatic experiencing can help you reconnect with your body and regulate how it responds to stress. Support systems, whether they’re friends, family, or community groups, can also make a world of difference in creating safety and openness as you heal.
Trauma responses are not flaws—they’re survival instincts. By understanding them, we take the first step toward reclaiming our power, reconnecting with ourselves, and building a life guided not by fear, but by choice.